Does that happen to you?.. To be sad with no apparent reason.. It sounded so cynical to me, because how can you be sad if nothing invited sadness. But then, how can the idea of happiness without a cause be much more admissible to think about? Why can't we say we are sad without grounds..and not be scoffed at?
On my way home yesterday I met an acquaintance who told me I looked upset, she asked me why and the only ready answer I could throw at that moment was a plain "warai la" (nothing). That was easier to say than to ramble a list of the superficial things that made me look 'upset'.Things like passing by a funeral march, hearing a crappy sad song and getting emotionally unstable whenever I get my period. So I excused myself before she could say anything about my lousy reply.
This morning wasn't so different as well, maybe it has to do with the weather, this cold cuddle-needing climate that's been bugging my already frenzied hormones. Its like how they say it, the waking up on the wrong side of the bed thing. I think its normal, bad days happen (especially when you're losing blood, literally bleeding.. haha). Isn't it just too much to ask for a happy-everyday?.. Not so good things are bound to happen, we can't control that. And it doesn't make us that less of a person to admit that we feel that way, because as much as we want to we are not and will never be invincible. I remember reading from somewhere that feeling badly, really feeling it, chewing on it and digesting it is often the precursor to not feeling so badly. That once in a while we need to give ourselves permission to feel blue in order to appreciate the sunshine that will happen eventually.
This morning wasn't so different as well, maybe it has to do with the weather, this cold cuddle-needing climate that's been bugging my already frenzied hormones. Its like how they say it, the waking up on the wrong side of the bed thing. I think its normal, bad days happen (especially when you're losing blood, literally bleeding.. haha). Isn't it just too much to ask for a happy-everyday?.. Not so good things are bound to happen, we can't control that. And it doesn't make us that less of a person to admit that we feel that way, because as much as we want to we are not and will never be invincible. I remember reading from somewhere that feeling badly, really feeling it, chewing on it and digesting it is often the precursor to not feeling so badly. That once in a while we need to give ourselves permission to feel blue in order to appreciate the sunshine that will happen eventually.
So I guess I just have to be patient with the shivers, a warm blanket, cups of coffee and a great mash-up will be enough to keep me company today. :]
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